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How to make friends at a new school
Wednesday, 07 February 2018 00:00

Starting a new school is hard.

How to Make Friends at a New School

Five Parts:
1. Finding your confidence
2. Having a positive approach
3. Getting involved
4. Detecting the cliques
5. Enjoying your new friendships

Starting with a new school can be difficult. Everything seems to be so weird, and you don't even know where to go for your own classes. Making new friends can be hard too, because everyone seems to have already made their own cliques. However, you can integrate into your new environment. Just try to have as much fun as you did in your old school. One way is to simply ask someone, "What's your name?" or "Would you like to hang out after school?" (but make sure you know how they act around other people). You can also ask if they have seen a certain movie or show. They might ignore you, but if they do, simply move on to someone else.

Part 1 of 5: Finding your confidence
1. Take a deep breath. You shouldn't be nervous, you're going to a new school, not to torture. Remember that in your new school you will find kids your age. You're going to meet people who like you there. Don't judge others before you get to know them
2. Be yourself. Never change who you are to try and fit in. If your friends don't accept you for you, they're not really friends. Most people belong with a certain clique simply because they are being themselves and their unique personalities and interests falls into that stereotype. For example, someone who is naturally athletic may become a jock in high school or someone who naturally artistic or emotional may become part of the emo crowd. Many people can tell you are a fake. Don't try too hard.

3. Be hygienic. No one likes a whiff of body odor or bad breath that could knock someone over. Shower daily, wear deodorant, brush your teeth, and wash your hair. Designer clothes aren't necessary, but look neat, whatever you wear. Good grooming can make you seem cleaner and more approachable. •Mints are a great way to keep your breath fresh throughout the day but good teeth cleaning should be all you really need.

Part 2 of 5: Having a positive approach
1. Be kind to the new people you meet at the new school. Make sure to be nice to people of all cultures and backgrounds. If you think that you will say something that will make them feel sad, do not say anything and just nod your head if they talk to you. Also,remember to be as kind and as helpful as possible!
2. Be inviting. A smile goes a long way. When you walk in the halls, don't hunch over your books or keep your eyes on the floor. Stick your chin up and make eye contact with other people. If you see someone you know, give a smile or say hi. Introduce yourself. Tell them your name and where you're from. Ask a question: "How's the cafeteria food around here?" Chat about the new school: "How long have you gone to this school?" or even a compliment "I love your shoes, where did you get them?"
3. Make the first move. Anywhere, in the bathroom, near your locker, or at the water fountain, you can find someone that has things in common with you, all you need is to know how to approach them. Strike up a conversation, smile and compliment them, and, of course, introduce yourself and tell them where you came from! You never know where you can find a nice friend.
4. Remember people's names. You like it when people use your name, and so do other people. Moreover, people can get annoyed if you don't remember their name. Ask them gently if they have a nickname. You'd be surprised where this can come in handy.
5. Do something nice for someone. Save someone a seat. Say "hi" in the hall. Give congratulations for a job well done. Pay a compliment: "I love your shoes/backpack" It can make wonders.

Part 3 of 5: Getting involved
1. Join after school activities you like. Choir or theater or hang around for a French club meeting, etc. Even if you don't know anyone there, you'll all share a common interest, and you can experience with different personalities from yours that have the same interest!
2. Look for other people who are new to the school. You're probably not the only one and at the very least, you'll have one thing in common: you're both in an unfamiliar environment. The good news is, if you are starting at a new school in start up year, almost everyone is new! Since being new is something that you all have in common, making new friends shouldn't be that hard. Talk about your old school, your new school, your opinions, grades, teachers, etc.
3. Don't sit at the back of the class where other people don't notice you! Try to sit in the middle where you're around everyone and can make conversation.

Part 4 of 5: Detecting the cliques
1. Figure out who the "mean girls" or the "hot-headed jocks" are. These are the people that you might want to avoid for a while. Don't be mean to them and don't completely avoid them, because who knows, they may be nice people! Also stay away from the types that are in gangs and do criminal activities. You need to be yourself. Be strong. And don't try to please everyone around you if it doesn't please you.

Part 5 of 5: Enjoying your new friendships
1. Finally, meet up with your new friends outside of school once you get to know them. This is an important step in making true friends who you can rely on. Just be yourself and don't let anyone change that.

•  If you're naturally shy, try to seem open to others by keeping your head high and smiling. Don't stare at the floor when walking, look at the people around you. Greet others. Push your boundaries every day.
•  Take the time to get to know everyone and their personalities. Think about: What similarities do I share with...? What differences do I have compared to...? Are they the type of people I hung out with in my old school?
•  Don't let people's opinions of you affect you negatively. What's most important is what you think of yourself rather than what others think. Finding good friends is tough, and it may sometimes seem nearly impossible but look for friends who are like you (but not clones).
•  Quality over quantity. Don't automatically assume that the more friends you'll have, the happier you'll be. A few close friends can lead to richer relationships than a large but impersonal group.
•  Don't listen to gossip or possible rumors that judge other people. Get to know them yourself, and learn who they really are, not what others think of them.
•  Love yourself for who you are.
•  Be patient. Making new friends takes time, but you'll eventually find great friends, which will make that time worthwhile.
•  Joining a club or sport is a great way to make new friends.
•  Humor is golden. Tell jokes to others but don't look like you're trying too hard. Make sure your jokes are funny, but not mean and/or degrading to others. That's not the way you should make friends.
•  If you're really having trouble or are feeling depressed, then get some help. A little bit of counseling can make you feel ten times better and can improve your self confidence and social skills.
•  Be independent.
•  Don't be afraid to participate in class! Teachers love it and it will help you focus more!
•  Join or form a study group. This is a quick way to make (potential) friends, establish and multiply your network, and get timely academic support.
•  Be kind to everyone before looking for kindness.
•  Your guidance counselors and teachers will be more than happy to introduce you to other students in your class.
•  I'm going to a new school too. The best way to fit in is to be kind. People don't like loud or "starting a fight" type of people. If you know what I mean. And have a little humor. This is sure to make everyone like you.

Article by parents.com


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